“Follow your heart, listen to your inner voice, stop caring about what others think.”
— Roy T. Bennett (The Light in the Heart)
So much angst is in that space between what other people think and what my gut tells me. I am not a person who “doesn’t care what other people think.” How do you do that?!!! I prefer the adage, “What people think of you is none of your business.” Caring about what other people think (and the suffering that can come with that) does not mean what other people think is true about you and your ideas. We have to care more about our inner guidance, the knowing in our gut, that still, quiet voice (always tender and kind even if the message is unexpected). Finding ease with ‘trusting your gut’ isn’t always easy but worth the effort.
“Never depend on the admiration of others. There is no strength in it. Personal merit cannot be derived from an external source. It is not to be found in your personal associations, nor can it be found in the regard of other people. It is a fact of life that other people, even people who love you, will not necessarily agree with your ideas, understand you, or share your enthusiasms. Grow up! Who cares what other people think about you!” — Epictetus (The Art of Living: The Classical Manual on Virtue, Happiness, and Effectiveness)
In my experience, the best discernment process is to first seek feedback from trusted people in your life. Trust your gut on who to ask. After you hear their wise words, retreat. Sit with the problem, and trust what your gut tells you, even if it’s different from what people tell you. And true confessions, I don’t always do well with this. It can be complicated. And worth it if you persist.
In Imagine: How Creativity Works, Jonah Lehrer writes: “The good news is that the human mind has a natural ability to diagnose its own problems and assess the kind of creativity needed.” Accessing this inner “knowing” is some way to be alone and contemplate. Mediate, pray, walk, hike – choose what works for you. Hold the problem in your body without consciously searching for an answer. Just be with the question. “Numerous studies have demonstrated that when it comes to a problem that doesn’t require insights, the mind is remarkably accurate at assessing the likelihood that a problem can be solved. … People were able to assess their closeness to the solution without knowing what the solution was. However, when those feelings of knowing tell you that you’re getting closer – when you feel the poetic meter slowly improves or sense that the graphic design is being unconcealed – you need to keep on struggling and continue to pay attention until it hurts. There is nothing romantic about this kind of creativity, which consists mostly of sweat, sadness, and failure. …Nevertheless, such a merciless process is sometimes the only way forward.”
“You have to trust in something – your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.” ― Steve Jobs
#23 When You Know (in your gut)
July 30, 2022
By Leslie
